Why you should love a ‘dad bod’
Do you want to grate cheese on your boyfriend’s biceps or would you rather eat fondue off his big old belly?
by Tara Keeney
As the temperature increases men all over the world take the opportunity to reveal why they have been so miserable over the past few months. They show off the body they have so desperately been working on that has many girls drooling.
The “perfect body” admired by many females consists of aiming to look like a classical Greek statue, who all appear to be overcompensating for something.
For women like me, dad bods are the only way forward ladies.
Hey fatty boom boom want another creme cake? Well in fact – yes he does. And I love it.
That extra bit of meat round the edges is what we should all be looking for and these are just a few reasons why…
They have a better fridge
Think about the bed side table snacks he’ll have. Think about the heavenly contents of his fridge. It’s a win/win for you. You don’t want to ‘netflix and chill’ with quinoa and kale. You want the fried things in life.
Think about it clearly – do you want to grate cheese on your boyfriend’s biceps or would you rather eat fondue off his big old belly?
There’s less bullshit to deal with
When a boy chooses fried chicken over grilled it shows a lot about them. They don’t succumb to grilled chicken bullshit – they know what they want from life. If they don’t lie to themselves, they probably won’t lie to you.
You’ll also feel more attractive next them, and in photographs it won’t keep looking like you date guys that are permanently constipated.
You know what the future holds for his physique, so there are no surprises later on.
They are more masculine
There’s something pretty homo erotic about a guy who lives at the gym. I begin to question if most of them are even doing it for girls? As their membership gets longer, their shorts get shorter as they all nearly explode from tensing too hard. Beads of sweat roll over their exceptionally large nipples as they grunt to each other, “how much do you lift bro?”
The orgasmic groans that come from boys doing squats are louder than any adult bedroom activity – surely not a good sign?
They are more cultured
Spending more time on the sofa results in a far better education of the latest TV programs and movies. While the gym boys upload Instagrams of their grilled chicken and broccoli with #gains #protein #summerbod next to it, you’ll be having cultured conversations from all the intellectual programs you’ll have watched.
They know how to party
They concentrate on the fun things in life. They care less about their appearance, their protein shake, or what people think. Without that gym membership they’ll have more money for nights out and to get unnecessary Uber’s round the corner so you never have to walk in heels again – the dream.
Instead of the attention being focused on improving their boobs, it can instead be focused on your boobs. Parrrrrtttttty.
They’re better at spooning
A cuddle is the best part of any relationship. So when you get to be scooped up and spooned by a big warm belly – what could be nicer. You don’t want to go to bed with an over inflated hulk while you sleep. You want to rest your head on his mini bouncy castle belly that will reduce your heating bill by keeping you warm during winter.
So next time you go out, don’t automatically go for the guys who look like they haven’t had fun since 1994 due to dieting. Remember, flab is fab and if it’s good enough for Leonardo Di Caprio, it’s good enough for us.