If a guy sends you these texts you should probably avoid him
They are probably fuckboys
by Lauren Dana
Guys have a weird way of expressing their, ummm, interest and (most of the time) are pretty straight-forward about their desires. To help you steer clear of these fuckboys, STAY AWAY from your potential guy if he texts you these lines/emojis: #YouDeserveMore
The monkey covering his eyes
You are not some adorable little embarrassed monkey and that is NOT what this emoji is supposed to be used for. You are not cute. You are not funny. You are a fuckboy and you will stay away from me (and out of my pants).
Do not, I repeat, do not as a girl you do not know if she wants to come party at “your boy’s” house. That’s just plain old creepy.
“I’m horny for you”
Just no… creepy guy – I don’t know you. Do you really think I’m gonna do that? Fuck off. But don’t fret ladies, at least he said “at least.” Chivalry isn’t dead.
“It’s just a dick”
Attention males: We don’t want pictures of your dicks. That is not attractive. We’d much rather see your face than some pathetic, erect penis. Get your shit together, homie.
“I’m going to beat you if you don’t answer me”
Okay first off – why would anyone in their right mind (or otherwise) EVER want to see you after you jokingly (?) threaten to beat them? And then try and cover it up? So yes – helllllll no to that date. See ya never.
“Lemme see ya naked”
How about no?
“Just lonely and I need you”
Awwww how sweet. *cringes*
That 3am booty call
Even if I was up at that time, do you really think I’m gonna put on a full face of makeup, get out of my bed and sext/see you? No thank you, I’ll stay right here. Alone. Under my covers.
“Got open crib”
“Yeah, I don’t know you, but sure I’ll just come on over and fuck you!”said no girl, ever.
“I’ve been busy because (some absurd fake reason)”
Okay first off – how would your brother and his girlfriend breaking up impact your ability to see someone? Is it that time-consuming- 24/7, no time for anything else? I call bullshit.
“Can I see that lace?”
Homeboy, you did this one to yourself. NEVER, EVER mention a three-way to a girl you JUST started talking to, and THEN expect her to send you some racy thong pics. Get your head checked, sweetheart.
“I wanted someone to talk to in my current dark times”
Okay, said male: you sound absolutely nuts. I don’t know you. The fact that you’re sharing about your “dark times” makes me concerned, creeped out, and depressed. Why would I want to involve myself in your mess? Thanks but no thanks.
“Sit your pretty ass on my face”
Okay first off why is this even a thing? This doesn’t sound the least bit attractive. And second off, as she said, just go the fuck to sleep. xx
Related stories recommended by this writer:
● We acted like fuckboys for a night and now get why guys do it
● Introducing the cuckboy, the new worst type of fuckboy
● Catcalling is the most attractive thing a man can do