Let’s be honest, Carrie Bradshaw is the worst

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Let’s be honest, Carrie Bradshaw is the worst

And I thought to myself, is she actually awful?

Her walk-in wardrobe, Manhattan apartment and tight-knit group of friends may seem aspirational, but don’t let that fool you. Forget the hours you’ve spent longing for the Sex and the City dream of walking around New York City in fancy clothes, appearing on the covers of magazines and getting dresses given to you by Vera Wang.

Carrie Bradshaw is actually the worst.

If she isn’t belittling her friends’ problems and making them all about her, then she is spieling off homophobia and uselessly pining after Big, who also happens to be the worst. Yes, Carrie Bradshaw’s life is the stuff of teenage dreams. The fact that she can afford an apartment in Manhattan when all she does is write one column a week proves that it is just that: a dream.

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Carrie Bradshaw is selfish. Sure, the TV series is narrated by her and about her, but her selfishness surpasses this. Her friends go through some horrible things and she still tries to make everything all about herself. When Samantha’s going through chemo, all Carrie can talk about is her new love affair. Carrie also says that her getting dumped by a guy she had only just started seeing is worse than Charlotte’s failed marriage.

When Miranda is worried because she has just found out she has a lazy ovary, Carrie shouts out, “Hey, did anybody notice my purse?” Yeah, sure, Carrie, your new purse is so much more important than the fact that one of your best friends may not be able to have kids. Let’s not forget the time Carrie got angry at Charlotte for not giving her money for her apartment. Maybe if Carrie didn’t spend literally all her money on ridiculous clothes, she would be able to keep the apartment herself.

Carrie acts like she is the most balanced, well-rounded of all her friends. She slut shames Samantha, makes fun of Charlotte for being vanilla and shows that she thinks Miranda is too focused on her career. What makes Carrie so perfect? All she does is chase after Big over and over again, despite her friends advising her not to.

Big and Carrie’s romance is meant to be one for the ages; the Romeo and Juliet of noughties NYC. She cheats with Big when he’s married and it’s fine because he’s The One. Bullshit. The rest of the show has Carrie condemning cheaters but when she does it it’s ok.

Big makes Carrie’s story line dull. It pushes the idea that you have to keep trying to get back with that one person, even if that person is emotionally abusive and the relationship has failed several times in the past. Move on. That isn’t true love. It’s unhealthy. Big is a dick, but so is Carrie who constantly tries to push him to do things he doesn’t want to do.

She is constantly giving him ultimatums. He has to tell her she’s The One, or else she’ll leave. Carrie should have learnt by now that Big is rational and understands that it’s impossible to tell anyone if they’re The One, or if The One even exists outside of fairytales. Grow up Carrie.

Considering Sex and the City was supposed to be super progressive in the way it talked about sex, Carrie just can’t get her head around bisexuality. You would be forgiven for never watching the show ever again after seeing the Boy Girl Boy Girl episode in season three. Carrie dates a guy who she finds out is bi and she majorly freaks out. She calls bisexuality a “layover to gaytown.”

This is coming from a sex columnist. Let that sink in. Carrie writes about the weirdest shit and forces the most ill-fitting metaphors onto love and relationships, but she can’t understand bisexuality. She quizzes her lover on his sexual history and asks him if she’s as good in bed as the men he’s slept with. She treats his sexuality like a novelty for a little while, before dumping him because of it. Ugh.

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When Charlotte is dating a camp guy called Stephan, Carrie informs her that he could be a “gay straight” man or a “straight gay” man because “things aren’t as simple as gay and straight anymore.” Carrie then brings her gay friend to check if Stephan is gay or straight because apparently men aren’t allowed to be into theatre or interior design without being gay and, according to Carrie, bisexuality doesn’t exist. The whole episode has such a binary approach to sexuality.

In another episode, a gay couple Samantha knows asks her to have a threesome with them. Carrie finds this hilarious and blurts out, “BUT THEY’RE GAY!” They literally asked Samantha for a threesome though so shut up Carrie.

Sex and the City has its brilliant moments, but everyone knows that it is Samantha, not Carrie, that really makes the show.

@sophlwilson

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