You’re probably a Popcorn Hoe even if you don’t know what a Popcorn Hoe is
Don’t worry, it’s not a bad thing
by Amanda Ross
If you’re reading this, you are more than likely a so-called Popcorn Hoe. Don’t freak out though, because it’s not as terrible as it sounds.
To be a Popcorn Hoe is to be a low-key genius too smart to waste a single swipe of Becca highlighter on the plebes of your Tuesday morning lecture. You’re too wise to expose the basics of your day job to the realness that is your snatched waist in a bodysuit and Paige jeans. Too cunning to not sleep in on a Thursday and forgo a razor sharp winged liner.
You prefer to stunt when it actually counts: on turn up nights when you can spend hours artfully applying the Anastasia contour kit you treat like a firstborn child. And when you glow up Friday and Saturday, my god do you glow tf up.
Of course, there’s nothing wrong with wearing/not wearing makeup during the week. It’s your jam and if you want to show up to your science lab with a full cut-crease and over-lined lips then you are a goddess and let’s get drinks next week, but Popcorning has benefits. Not only do you get extra time to sleep, but you set the bar so low for yourself that when you do decide to stunt, everyone is blown the fuck away. You’re basically a ringer in the game of tricking people into wanting to have sex with you.
My fellow Popcorn Hoes, I celebrate you. Some people call it laze, some trickery, but I think we’re the only ones who have it truly figured out. Pop on, hoes. Pop on.
QUIZ: We know who’s going to get you pregnant
It better not be your shitty ex
by Amanda Ross
Some things are indisputable scientific facts: the earth revolves around the sun, climate change is real, and this quiz can prove exactly who will knock you up. Using an incredibly accurate method which I cannot name here for fear of theft, I can pinpoint with whooom you're going to conceive. Find out here:
Everything you know if you look young for your age
‘I’m gonna need to see some I.D.’
by Katie Way
Despite the fact that I am closing in on 23 years old, I could still probably pass for a high school student if I made a meme Instagram account and started wearing a lot of Stussy. My youthful appearance can be a gift or a curse depending on the scenario. it's great when I'm upset…
Why do we keep making thin women the patron saints of body positivity?
C’mon, we’ve all had it worse
by Caroline Phinney
Jennifer Lawrence opened up Monday about being “humiliated” early in her career when a producer told her to “lose 15 pounds in two weeks." She says he subsequently asked her to strip as a means of psyching her into it.If true, the experience she's described is shitty, it's fucked up and can also be classified…