We pranked our one-night stands and asked them out for Valentine’s Day
They freaked out
by Amanda Ross
Valentine’s Day is the Hunger Games of sex and attention, and without both you’ll probably die. We decided to take the hunt for Valentine’s Day dates to an extreme and hit up the lowest of the low on the totem of “wyd” texting — our former fuckbuddies and one-night stands.
The rules were simple: pick a former sex friend and with absolutely no context or explanation, ask them what our plans were for Valentine’s Day. Of course, things got weird.
So maybe be won’t be reconnecting in an “all this time it was you and I didn’t even realize it!” rom-com way. But it was worth a try, right?
Your #MCM has nothing on this big-dicked zoo animal
Time to dump your boyfriend for a tapir
by Nian Hu
Look, we all know that men can be unbelievably frustrating. Sure, they can be cute sometimes. But they barrage us with thirsty DMs and unsolicited dick pics, they ghost us after one date, and they use the same body wash to clean their hair and their nutsack. Hard pass. And even when we do end…
Did 3OH!3 predict hoeism’s meteoric rise?
It was definitely ahead of its time
by Amanda Ross
Allow me to paint a picture for you: it's the summer of 2008, the sun is beating down on the ginormous parking lot in which Warped Tour is held. A massive crowd of sweating teenagers in ass-cheek-revealing shorts from Ruehl (OMG remember Ruehl? That's a story for another time…) gathers in front of a main…
Should I go to Costa Rica with this wealthy older man I just met?
Or is it the plot of Taken 4!
by Harry Shukman
Imagine a mysterious and rich man met you in the park – the park! – asked you out, paid for your drinks, gave you gift cards, offered you dental surgery, and then asked to take you away to Costa Rica. Should you go? That's what one girl is asking in a relationship advice post that has to…