Why is everyone so afraid to admit they met their boyfriend on Tinder?


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Why is everyone so afraid to admit they met their boyfriend on Tinder?

Just embrace it

All too often I hear girls asked, “So how did you meet your boyfriend?” to which they pause before giving an embarrassed giggle and begrudgingly admitting that it was Tinder.

I can totally relate to these girls, having had a couple of Tinder relationships myself. I remember the dread I would feel when someone would ask me how I met them, and how I’d cringe when I’d have to mutter “…Tinder”. It’s certainly not helped by the fact there’s far more stigma for girls about having the app, as a opposed to a guy who might be happy to brag about their new found Tinder relationship.

Most of the time when I was asked, I’d lie to my family and my friends because I was afraid it wouldn’t seem like a legitimate relationship, and just a hookup or fling. Especially as most parents’ perception of tinder is that it’s some horny millennial mating ground. “I just met him at around uni Mum”, I’d lie. Sure, she definitely believed that clever, considered, un-falsifiable fib.

I didn’t want to lie, but I was embarrassed that I’d actually found something genuine on an app famous for its thirstiness. But it wasn’t until recently that I realised that relationships born from Tinder were nothing to be ashamed of. Seriously, Tinder relationships really aren’t all that rare anymore, and maybe if we all stopped lying about the fact we met online, we’d see how common they really are.

Within two years of its launch in 2012, Tinder had over 50 million users, a popularity that hasn’t been matched (pardon the pun) by any other online dating site. Let’s be real, how many couples meet in person nowadays? According to research conducted by eHarmony in 2015, meeting someone online is the second most popular way to meet someone (22 per cent of couples now meet online), second to only meeting through mutual friends (24 per cent).

So what’s up with the reluctance to admit you met your partner online? Your eyes met across a crowded room? Yawn. You got chatting as your dogs sniffed each other’s butts in the park? Gross. You bumped into each other on the way out of the library, you dropped your books, and he helped pick them up? Doesn’t happen. So what if you first came across your partner while lazily swiping during a lecture?

Actual marriages have come from Tinder matches, so the app is clearly what you make it. Besides, there are obvious benefits to meeting someone on Tinder instead of a more conventional way. The app has opened up a whole new platform in which you can meet people you might never have done without it. And while you’ll likely have lots of shared interests with whom you meet, you wont have an abundance of mutual friends, meaning when you go on a date with someone it’ll be a completely clean slate, and they wont have heard the story about that time you once woke up after a night out laid facedown in a pile of (your own?) vomit.

Sure, you might dream of plucking up the courage to approach your library crush, and having a beautiful moment kick start your life long romance. But why bother when you can match them on tinder instead? That’s definitely a story to tell the grand kids about – “your grandfather sent me a gif of someone winking and it just went from there!”

Tinder might have once just been known for casual hookups, but we can change this. Admittedly, someone on Tinder once asked to “see where I piss from” (sorry Mum, I know you’re reading this), so its not all sunshine and rainbows. Sure, you might find plenty of dick pic sending fuck boys on Tinder, but if you’re able to sort the, er, wood from the trees, you might meet a match for a quick drink and actually find you have a genuine connection with them.

So go forth and reclaim Tinder as a legitimate means of meeting your significant other, and proudly announce to your Nan during Sunday lunch that it was ‘love at first swipe’.