Everyone on Twitter is absolutely convinced Avril Lavigne is dead


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Everyone on Twitter is absolutely convinced Avril Lavigne is dead


There are some people out there – or should I say sheeple – who don’t believe in conspiracy theories. They don’t think Paul McCartney has been dead since 1967, they don’t think 9/11 was an inside job, they probably think Avril Lavigne is still alive and wasn’t replaced by a lookalike in 2003. To those people I implore you: read this Twitter thread and open your goddamn mind.

OK, so some background. The theory goes that Avril Lavigne, the true Avril died all the way back in 2003 when she tragically killed herself after the death of her grandfather (yeah, I know, it’s dark). Her record label, just like The Beatles’ record label all the way back in the 60s, decided her likeness was too valuable to lose and instead of announcing the death they replaced her with a lookalike.

Avril’s lookalike, Melissa Vandella, has been masquerading as the true singer for the past 14 years, according to the theory. And it gets seriously detailed, from comparing the shape of the their eyes to the “changing” birthmarks on Avril’s arms in later promotional shots, to her handwriting being different, even to the fact that Avril married that guy from Nickleback despite in her younger years correctly thinking that Nickleback were fucking cringe. Which to be fair, makes a lot of sense.

The weird thing is, the conspiracy theory isn’t even a new one. It first started gaining traction in 2012 and really picked up two years ago, when it was consequently written about by literally everyone. Avril herself – or Melissa, however you wanna look at it – even addressed the rumours in a stereotypically awkward interview where she flubbed her way through her denial. Annoyingly, it’s now been taken down from YouTube thanks to a copyright complaint from the Brazilian TV channel it originally aired on.

Anyway, this weekend @givenchyass started a Twitter thread revisiting the “Avril is dead” topic and it’s blown up in a big way.

In just two days the original thread has been retweeted 92,000 times and liked 149,000 (but it’s still going up fast). And more than that, fans are becoming amateur detectives to unearth more “dirt” than ever before. They’ve even started taking to Avril’s Instagram pics to accuse her of being Melissa and telling her to stop lying about her true identity. The fans have had enough of the dishonesty.

Look, obviously we’re living in a post truth world where there’s fake news everywhere you turn, so is it really that much of a leap to say that Avril Lavigne is an imposter and that explains the depressing musical chasm between the tortured songstress who wrote “I’m With You” and that terrifying Hello Kitty tribute she released in 2014?

  • I wanna believe, that’s all I’m saying.