You’re probably a clownfish even if you don’t know what a clownfish is

If you’re reading this, you’re probably a clownfish. But don’t worry, we’ve all been there.

Say you’ve just started talking to this really hot guy off Tinder or this girl you met in a coffeeshop. You start with your professions, your educational history, and whether or not they like Game of Thrones. Then, they throw it at you.

“Hey, do you like Jazz Music? I’m like, obsessed with Jazz.”

You respond like you’re totally into Jazz – all while googling who the fuck Miles Davis is and brushing up on hot piano tracks on Youtube.

We’ve all heard of a Catfish. You know, someone who makes a fake profile on social media to deceive a potential friend or partner. But the clownfish is much sneakier.

A clownfish is someone who lies about their interests or knowledge about something to seem more appealing to that Financial Consultant and underwear model they’re talking to online. But then, they get caught up in their lie – and may look like a clown.

You were a clownfish that one time you told Bobby you were totally into camping and then he invited you on a five-night camping trip. You had to pretend you were having really bad diarrhea to get out of it.

You were also a clownfish when you told Andy you’re a pro at anal then jumped like a fucking hopping bean when he pulled out a butt plug. Or when you told Sierra you loved Lord of the Rings that one time. She bought you the DVD boxed set for Christmas and you awkwardly responded “huh?”

I get it, a little white lie doesn’t hurt. But being a clownfish sometimes does – especially when it leads your future partner to think you like hiking when you can’t even climb a flight of stairs.

So pull a Nemo and find your self-esteem – tell them you like what you like. And if they don’t like you for it, they can hop out of your DMs.

The term ‘clownfish’ was made up by the girls at babe who have definitely all clownfished guys before. Because who actually cares about David Beckham’s free kick against Greece in 2001?