Your fave is problematic: Stop trying to get my nudes with the monkey emoji

It’s time to talk about the monkey emojis.

According to the people of Twitter, using a monkey emoji is the new language of  “haha are you a virgin?” fuckboys. You know, the kind who reply to your “sorry, I was in the shower” text with “haha without me?”

This kind of fuckboy is easily the most dangerous. While they appear nice, albeit a little campy, their toxic masculinity will pop up at some point like an uninvited boner — which they are sure to have if you hang out.

The monkey emoji is the premier way to screen for men who will send you that “I was just trying to be nice!!!” text

They’re suspicious as hell. Why is that monkey so happy?

So, using them is officially a deal breaker.

We just can’t trust you if you use something so cringy to flirt.

They’re like, a surefire way to get yourself blocked.

Abort fucking mission.

And cut out of our lives 5ever

You’re ugly now.

Monkey emojis are scary. It’s a fact.

I will call the police on you.

In text emojis only, please. I like to pretend like its 2008, when the world was pure and the Jonas Brothers were still together.