Low-rise jeans and belly buttons are trying to make a comeback and I’d like you to join me in my quest to stop them

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Low-rise jeans and belly buttons are trying to make a comeback and I’d like you to join me in my quest to stop them

My abs aren’t ready for this

Someone once said they don’t regret the things they did, but the things they didn’t do when they had the chance. I don’t exactly have this quote tattooed on my body, but it’s hidden in my phone in the form of a bad Tumblr pic for when I need to remind myself I shouldn’t regret anything I’ve done.

For example, I don’t regret ever wearing low-rise jeans. I was 12 and didn’t know any better, so when Britney made them seem like God’s gift to fashion, I jumped on that train. Thinking back on those teenage years, damn, those jeans were tight. Bell bottoms, too, ugh. I’m now trying to remember if I ever sat down in high school without having to cover up my butt with a sweater. It was rough.

But I know you’ve been through similar times. Maybe you tried having a belly button ring for a bit, wore low-rise jeans with a teeny crop top, or even tried the ‘oops I didn’t know my thong was peeking out my jeans’ look. And I’m here to tell you that’s OK. We can’t regret our fashion choices anymore. The only thing we can do is get together to stop them from coming back.

Apparently, and I don’t know who the fuck approved this, low-rise jeans and belly buttons are making their way back into our lives.

I love fashion, but I’ll never understand how it can give us such a good thing (read: anything high-waisted) and then just take it away as if we aren’t emotionally attached. Like, I feel hurt. My lower abs haven’t seen the light of day since 2007 and I planned to keep it that way. And now we’re back to this?

I should have realized something bad was up when I got asked if I had an innie or an outie the other day. I literally had to pick up my top and check because there hasn’t been a need to look at my belly button in years.

I’m not the only one who feels personally attacked

SOME PEOPLE ARE HAPPY ABOUT THIS MESS???

We need to fight back before this gets out of control

Spread the word and do whatever you can to stop this madness.

Join me and let’s collectively defeat the chiseled enemy.

@elenimitzali

Is it just me?

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