Destroying the myth of the ‘Golden Pussy’

There's always that one insufferable girl who somehow is with an incredible partner and you have no fucking idea how. The explanation is always the same, though: she must have a golden pussy.

But get ready to clutch your pearls because I'm about to hit you with some truth: the golden pussy doesn't exist.

According to relationship expert Susan Winter, the golden pussy is a myth and nothing more. No one woman has a more magical vagina than another. The difference? Girls who you can't stand but have somehow landed incredible men just open up more.

Yes. Seriously.

"Opening up is the only velcro that makes a guy stick. It's the difference between you being just another girl he's slept with and someone he can get serious with," Susan says. So what does that mean?

We need to stop being closed off with walls protecting our hearts so big, only Trump could dream them up. It means we need to be open and vulnerable and honest with ourselves and with the people we date. I'm the first person to run whenever someone tries to get me to open up but maybe that's why I haven't found someone — maybe my insistence on being a closed off ice queen is the reason I keep finding fuckboys instead of real men.

Men might not even realize you being open is why you're sticking around. Stay with me here, but I have this theory that maybe the reason they think "that pussy gold" is because they're emotionally connected to you but don't know it. You've inceptioned them by being open and sliding into their hearts and so the sex is obviously going to be better with feelings involved.

Golden pussy isn't this unattainable gift bestowed to a few select women by the gods. It's something attainable — something we're all capable of possessing. We all have a pussy but the key to making it golden? Letting our walls down and letting someone else in, risk and all.

@jenniferficarra