I am begging you, teens of the internet: Do not use toothpaste and piss as a pregnancy test

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I am begging you, teens of the internet: Do not use toothpaste and piss as a pregnancy test

So here’s what we’re not gonna do!

Pregnancy scares, like nights spent throwing up Smirnoff Ice or highlights you got at the Hair Cuttery, often serve as stark reminders of the consequences of youthful experimentation.

Anxiety, shame and fear often drive people, particularly young women, towards the internet in search of answers. And the internet provides, but most of what it provides is stupid garbage that confused young people should stay far the fuck away from.

There is a video on Youtube with over 3 million views that supposedly demonstrates how mixing pee and toothpaste can definitively prove whether or not you are pregnant. Please, do not listen to it because that is not real and won’t work.

  • In an interview with the Independent, gynecologist Dr. Alex Eskander said “there is no scientific basis for detecting pregnancy by mixing urine with toothpaste,” because there obviously isn’t. Instead, he recommended using store-bought pregnancy tests, which look for a specific hormone in urine to determine if you're pregnant.

    But the toothpaste method, in which the presence of a “blueish foam” once droplets of urine are added to a cup of toothpaste indicates pregnancy, is based in zero science.

    The toothpaste method sounds like a lie that a parent would tell a small child to hide another weirder reason for having an entire cup of toothpaste. Its very existence is a compelling argument for high-quality sex education and even better oral hygiene education. Does the woman who made this video think toothpaste is magic?

    Plus, the internet is a god-awful resource when it comes to all things pregnancy. Anyone can post on forums like Quora, Reddit and Yahoo Answers, or sites like Youtube. If you're really looking for the low-down, try experts at Planned Parenthood or MedLinePlus.

    No!

    What the fuck?

  • But most of all, if you’ve had unprotected sex and are worried about pregnancy, don’t eye-drop some of your pee into a cup of toothpaste and stir it together like a horrible smoothie.

    Pop some Plan B and then, depending on where you are in your cycle, you might have to play the waiting game. Even the fastest tests can only accurately predict pregnancy 12 days before your next period. And plot twist: those tests involve zero toothpaste.

    @k80way