These costumes prove everyone’s gotten really fucking good at Halloween

Why did I decide to be a devil AGAIN?

I have a confession to make: I'm terrible at Halloween. And it honestly sucks because I'm totally obsessed with it. Without fail, though, every single year, I try to envision myself in a costume that will rocket me to Instagram celebrity, make my crush like me back, clear up my skin and fill my bank account with riches.

And every year, I just go as a cat.

But everyone else, it seems, just got so good at it??? I checked Twitter, Instagram, and FB this morning, expecting to be met with enough sexy bunnies to fill a Spirit Halloween warehouse. Instead, I was hit with a barrage of fucking brilliant costumes so clever and cute, I actually started to shake with jealousy. I had to eat a whole pizza to calm down!

So I begrudgingly present this list of good-ass costumes I wish I'd a) thought of, and b) had the creativity to pull off:

Met Ball Rihanna

I forgot how good this meme was

Female Migos (Migas?)

Gordon Ramsey and his beloved Idiot Sandwich

Two treasonous criminals >:)

Riverdale-ified Arthur

Tiny Friday

Tina Belcher and her glorious butt

Did y'all know the rat's name isn't Ratatouille? I just learned that last week

How I'm trying to be

Nice costume, Janice, what's it made of?

Yet another perfect Rihanna

Wish I could get a man to commit to me the way these friends committed to this joke

A colorful series of Lil Kims

I don't really *get* this, but I love it?

I honestly can't even pick which Rihanna costume is best

A gorgeous genderbent Kaepernick

This good (but scary) boy

And finally, I can't tell if she's a Bratz Doll or just Kylie Jenner