Vinny from Jersey Shore is the hot, woke savior 2018 deserves

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Vinny from Jersey Shore is the hot, woke savior 2018 deserves

He’s basically a perfect specimen

If you could all stop apologizing for liking Jersey Shore long enough for me to make an extremely important announcement, I'd appreciate it.

Vincent "Vinny" Guadagnino, woke king, animal adoption advocate and spokesperson for climate change regulation, is no longer only the only hot character to have graced Jersey Shore. He'll also make an amazing president one day. I mean, the path from reality show stardom to leader of the free world is already paved. He just needs to keep walking it.

Trump's Jerusalem speech in which he appeared to be sighing heavily and slurring his words already reminds me a lot of this iconic scene from Jersey Shore, so I wouldn't say it's a stretch to presume one of them might run for office one day:

But all jokes aside, Vinny "grew up" in more ways than one.

He's concerned about climate change

This week, when Trump mocked our country for wanting to protect the planet from melting and decaying into oblivion, Vinny supplied him with a thoroughly thought-out response about why a colder winter has nothing to do with whether or not we're affected by climate change.

He even broke it down into nice, bite-sized pieces for him.

He's a feminist with a BA in political science

Not only does Vinny understand the tragic ramifications of our country's inability to take climate change seriously thanks to his degree in political science, he also has a master's in "womenry" because of his PhD. I think Pitbull claims to have that too?

He takes mental health seriously

In a 2013 episode of "Jersey Shore," Vinny opened up about suffering from clinical anxiety. "Especially in high school, that's when I really started having really bad panic attacks," he said, right before suggesting fans with similar symptoms "remove themselves from the situation at hand" as a coping mechanism.

And on the Half of Us website, there are multiple testimonial videos from Vinny himself. "Just speaking up is the hardest part," he says.

He's written a book

Vinny has written a book with a 4.7 star rating on Amazon about his plan to "stop stressing, avoid drama, and maintain inner cool." Have YOU written a book about that? Have you so much as though about doing that? When will your fave?

He knows to adopt when buying a pet

Each year, 2.7 million adoptable dogs and cats are euthanized in the United States because too many pets come into shelters and too few people consider adoption when looking for a pet.

Vinny is not one of those people — he adopts.

He knows you can be smart AND fun

For some reason, everyone assumes all unintelligent people are fun and all smart people have to be boring and like, turtleneck-wearers. But Vinny knows it's more complex than that, and the best of us know how to have both.

So Vinny and Trump actually have a lot in common. Both of them are reality TV stars and both of them have massive followings, but one of them also has a BA in political science, cares about the environment, can party AND is hot?

Bring on my Obama 2.0.

@carolinephinney

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