Millie Bobby Brown’s social media relationship with her boyfriend will have you flashing back to AIM
She’s TOYING with him
If you were anything like me in middle school, you spent a lot of time on, uhm, boys. Not just like, trying to get your crush to kiss you. You spent time deep-diving into romantic drama. Your life was a fucking soap opera.
You were constantly posting Facebook statuses to make your 12-year-old ex think your life was GREAT so he'd regret dumping you in 5th period. Or wasting nights making the perfect away message that would make Johnny wish he were talking to you instead of staring at your page. Or maybe that's just me. Either way, Millie is just like the rest of us were when we were 13.
So, Millie is apparently dating Musical.ly star Jacob Sartorius
If you don't know what Musical.ly is, all you need to know is it's a YouTube-like hellhole for pre-teen and teen douchebags.
Jacob seems nice and talented, right? Ok. Should be a breeze for them. But no, they're 13 & 15, so of course everything is "complicated" in a way only Middle School romances can be. The two celebrated New Years Eve together at Disneyland, But right after that, they were going through a rough patch in their less than three month long relationship.
She posted this GIF of her kissing Finn Wolfhard to make Jacob jealous
Even though she's a world-famous, award-winning actress, she's soaking in all the middle-school-romance drama she possibly can. And really, she's doing it in the pettiest of ways. What a little, bald queen.
And guess what? It fucking worked.
Jacob responded with a SERIES of tweets about how heartbroken he was
He even called himself ugly. Someone get this boy a Prozac prescription.
But they literally made up the next day
Jacob bought her a bear. Like one of those big, fluffy ones you always wanted a cute boy to buy you on Valentine's Day. That lucky bitch.
There's definitive proof it was from him.
It seems like things are better from Jacob's very, uhm, intense tweets
His life with Millie seems great.
And things are moving like… kinda fast?
But weren't you planning to marry your 14-year-old boyfriend? I know I was. Because that's kinda what Middle School love is like: a bunch of 13-year-olds running around thinking they're 30, while they have the social skills of a serial subtweeter. Just saying.
I'm glad Jacob and Millie are back together, and I hope they have tons of fun together. But just know, if Jacob treats MBB badly, I will call his mom.
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