IRL •
Here’s what historic vine you are based on your star sign
Cancer, this is why we all make fun of you
by Una Dabiero
In January 2017, Twitter shut down Vine, proving to us all that they not only love nazis but also hope to see our entire generation die in a pit of depression. In commemoration of this historic time, we're here to tell you which iconic vine you are based on your star sign. Prepare to be dragged.
Aries
Aries, you are so so sweet to the people you know. You are a loyal friend and a great listener. But you are also a fucking bitch to people you hate. Not just like a passive-aggressive bitch, either. An AGGRESSIVE bitch. Basically, your personality is just like "Fuck Off Janet" guy's. Be good to Aries or else.
Taurus
Taurus, you're dedicated and dogged to a fault. You're so into everything you fucking do and you will defend the things you love until you die. Kinda like the kid who focused reallllyyy hard to spell "Iridocyclitis."
Gemini
Gemini is literally represented by the twins. We all know you're a little two-faced. And you know, that's not really a bad thing. You know how to play the field. But as a result, sometimes you end up in a few lies: that's why you're the "why you always lying" Vine.
Cancer
Cancer, you have so much love for people but you're so fucking naive. As a result, your life is kinda always a train wreck. Here's a visual representation.
Leo
Leos know that they love the spotlight. You're always the one to dance on tables, post thirst traps, and swipe right on everyone just for the messages. You know who else loves the spotlight? Dancing Terio.
Virgo
Virgo, you're addicted to perfection. You know that everything you do is flawless and you will NOT allow people to minimize that. So when someone tells you that you did something wrong, you say "bitch, where?"
Libra
Libra, you are so fucking chill. You are so go with the flow, I had no idea how to define you. But I do know you say "yes" or at least "ok" to everything, awkwardly, hoping you don't stir the pot. As a result, you're the "okay guy" vine. This isn't even a drag. I wish I were this friendly, tbh.
Scorpio
Scorpios are fucking bold. You know exactly how to get what you want. You know what else is really bold? Screaming "DEEZ NUTS" into a phone and then capitalizing on it as a personal brand.
Sagittarius
Sagittarius, you're very adventurous. So adventurous, you would probably steal your mom's car to get somewhere far away from the hellhole you call a hometown. Broom Broom!
Capricorn
Capricorn, you march to the beat of your own drum. Partially because you are too ambitious to let anyone hold you back, and partially because you're too fucking stubborn to do anything anyone else's way. That's why you're the "It's Wednesday, My Dudes" vine. You're… unique.
Aquarius
Aquarius, you're just really fucking honest. You will do anything to tell your truth. Even if your truth is that you wrap yourself up like an upside down burrito at night.
Pisces
Pisces, we all know you're a fucking softy. When you fall in love, you can never let that person go. That's why you're definitely the vine known for celebrating a man's everlasting love for his proverbial "bitch." Try not to cry those Pisces tears.