Can someone please explain WHY we’re letting G-Eazy happen?
Together, we can put a stop to this
by Katie Way
I've known about G-Eazy for a few years now because I have bad taste and used to date a G-Eazy fan. Yikes. Hindsight is 20/20. But it seems like in 2017, his star really started rising and it doesn't look like that's gonna change any time soon.
He's part of a celeb power couple — well, if you consider being really tacky powerful. He's got two different songs on the Billboard Hot 100 chart, and the gall to post shit like this on Instagram:
You're! Not! The Weeknd!
I'm sorry to say it, but G-Eazy is an A-lister, you guys. And he needs to be stopped immediately.
First of all, we just don't need another guy who looks like this. Aesthetically, young Johnny Depp and your high school production of Grease already happened. And John Mayer literally has the same face but hotter.
If you told me that the man in the above photo was none other than Mr. Gerald Eazy, I would not say shit in protest.
And I just can't get over the fact that G-Eazy's style is so plainly lifted from cool guys in cartoons and Alex Turner from the Arctic Monkeys that it's basically comical.
Dude, it's not actually cool to chew on a toothpick! It's sort of gross! And you really don't have to make your slicked back 'do look that wet all the time to make girls like you — we understand how hair product works, and we can tell that you're using way too much.
G-Eazy is also, at his core, a fucking poser for painting himself as some kind of dangerous outlaw.
I'm not saying that it's awesome when rappers commit crimes. But I am saying that it's pretty funny to hear the son of two art professors from Berkeley, California rap about "mobbin' til the end of time" and worry about "if I ever go down, get caught, or they identify." Get caught doing what, G-Eazy? Smoking weed with your mom?
Then there's the fact that G-Eazy does not make music that is like, good to listen to. Both of his aforementioned Billboard-charted songs are bolstered by female artists because there's not a song in existence that a Cardi B verse can't save.
G-Eazy: Aye! Aye! Aye! AYE! Aye! Aye!
fuck him then I get some money!
Fuck him then I get some money!
Fuck him then I get some money!
Fuck him then I get SOME MONEY!
— kay. (@beyoncehatesme) January 23, 2018
But in general, G-Eazy makes the kind of slimy white guy rap bangers that the popular dudes in high school used to blast while they were drunk-driving to McDonalds.
For instance, there's this tasteful ode to the most notorious White House intern ever:
Or the time he teamed up with EDM's favorite misogynist to make the best song to jog to if you hate yourself:
It's just… really not great.
Do I think that Gerald is a bad guy? Honestly, no. He seems…fine. But even though G-Eazy terminated his relationship with H&M after their racist hoodie scandal (2018 is wild), I'm still not convinced that he's good for the culture.
I'm not inherently against white dudes rapping — I went through a hard Eminem phase in middle school. But G-Eazy is not Eminem. His music is trashy, he dumped Lana del Rey, and he should go back to 2013 where he belongs.