Stop writing off small guys because you think you’ll kill them during sex
He knows what he signed up for
by Ari Bines
Listen ladies, I've been the "big and tall" girl the entire time I was held hostage by the Department of Education.
But unfortunately, all of us big and/or tall queens often feel awkward and sometimes even insecure about our partners' height and weight because we don't want to seem "less feminine" by comparison.
Well, I'm here to tell you that that's all bullshit and you need to start taking more chances on the guys you think you'll crush in bed.
'We'll look weird together'
Sooo, you care about what other people think more than your own happiness? Because that's essentially what you're saying. And I get it. I really do. When I was dating my ex, who was 5'6" to my 5'9", I literally always felt like I was on the Maury Povich show—the odd couples edition. Look at how we went to prom together in comparison to all of my other friends and their dates:
I know it's hard to hear, but I'm telling you not to brush off the shorter, lankier dudes because you never know what may come of it. And in all honesty, that's just real ass life. Remember how everyone was absolutely FUH-lored that Ashley Graham appeared as Joe Jonas's love interest in DNCE's video for Toothbrush?
I love that Ashley Graham is in DNCE's video as a love interest. YAS TO LOVING CURVY BODIES
— samantha (@OnYourCallender) June 14, 2016
The buzz that the video caused was probably due to the fact that there are so many real-life couples who emulated their on-screen romance—which we never ever see in mainstream media.
Ashley Graham talking about Joe! : "Joe's a little cutie patootie"
And talks about DNCE casting her in their video😘🙌 pic.twitter.com/eyDMCnoVp3
— Joe Jonas Fandom (@JoeJonasFandom) May 28, 2016
I can openly and honestly admit that I've been in plenty of relationships and situationships with short and lanky dudes because quite frankly, they treated me better than a tall glass of fuckboy would. In fact, it was my very first boyfriend, a 6'1" and a point guard for his school's basketball team, who was sketchy as shit. All I can say about him is that when I asked him if he was involved in some gang shit, he hung up on me. That was the end of that.
'What if I'm too heavy?'
I already know your go-to sex position is probably either missionary, doggy or any other submissive pose that doesn't require your weight to dominate his. When I was in bed with my ex, I would constantly worry about being too big or too heavy to the point where I thought kill him during sex. As it turned out, though, he loved thicker girls because they were heavier. Guys like a challenge — and they like to be dominated every now and then, so your taller, thicker bod does wonders for his sex drive. You're sometimes what they call "a real woman." Problematic phrasing, I know, but whatever works.
Honestly, who cares?
Because of television and social standards, we've gotten so caught up in gender roles about who's supposed to physically be the bigger person in the relationship that we miss out on really awesome (and sexy as fuck) short guys who can handle all of our curves in the way that you know you want. You can still go after the skyscrapers, because I know how we love to hang on tall guys, but don't eliminate the under-5'10" guy because he knows how hard he'll have to work to make your time in bed together worthwhile.