Ned from Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide is CRAZY STUPID HOT now

When I was like, 13, I had no standards. Literally if a guy had both of his arms and didn't have an eye-patch like Max did in 4th grade, I was all in. As a result, I had crushes on every boy I encountered — IRL and on TV. I wasn't picky.

I had a crush on Gordo from Lizzie McGuire, Louis from Even Stevens, and especially Aaron Carter. My mom never let me listen to his music, but he made cameos in every kids show ever — so you could say we really knew each other. But I realized I had forgotten about one boy I majorly crushed on all those years ago: Ned from Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide.

What was he doing now? Had he turned into a limp trash bag left out in the rain, like Rico from Hannah Montana? I had to look him up. And my quick Google search had the best result ever: In the beautiful year of 2018, Ned from Ned's Declassified is a complete snack.

Yes, you heard me right. This guy is a dime. I would cut off my right hand to be with him, and that's really saying something because that's my iPhone hand.

So, his name is Devon Werkheiser

Devon is hot. I'll take it.

And he's 26

Age is just a number, really.

He acts (kinda)

In 2017, he was in an episode of 2 Broke Girls. He also does plays on the reg.

And he's released some singles

None of them are "good," but playing piano is pretty hot?

But even if his career is kinda… ehhh

He's literally "praying for a breakthrough"

And his Instagram captions are **terrible**

I gagged when I read this one.

He's really…

…really…

hot

If you'll excuse me, I have some private business to attend to. It 1000 percent does not include my vibe.