Fun fact: you're more likely to stop receiving texts from someone you like if you just say "hi."
However, for those of you with a touch of substance, I've got a whole playbook that I look to for signs that you're getting ghosted, and hopefully after reading this, you'll be able to spot when gonna' get Caspered.
The've stopped watching your Instastories
There are always specific people who you can rely on to give you those views, and the person with the best pullout game should be giving your page the most love.
If I expressed interest in a guy and he subsequently stopped watching my Instagram stories and unfollowed me on social media does he like me
— Ali Segel (@OnlineAlison) May 31, 2017
Once you notice that your videos are only being seen by your best friends, cat people and those fake accounts that probe you for money for followers, drop him.
Your phone convos all of a sudden die out
If you start to notice that those 5-hour over the phone convos are starting to dim down, it's because they're about to dip on your ass.
my mom keeps asking if i’m still getting ghosted like yeah chill are you still divorced
— esme (@esmetopp) February 6, 2018
Don't start getting upset and argue them after the fact that you've been ghosted, because this was the warning sign that they're not feeling you or your vibe anymore.
They choose to literally Netflix & chill at home… without you
Whoever you’re dating (or just ‘hanging out’ with), there will be a time when they just don’t feel like getting up and out of bed for you and you should fear for your sanity.
i'm getting ghosted by the fbi agent assigned to monitor me through my webcam
— trstzn (@trstzn) February 27, 2018
At first, you won’t think anything of it and you’ll excuse it as everyday laziness, but really think about it. You easily could’ve dragged your ass to their house to chill with them. It’s a clear ass sign they’re done with you and you’re about to get the ax.
They send you one syllable text messages
How much or how little is said in a text speaks volumes about when you’re ghosting ceremony is about to commence.
So my ex husband is now getting married to someone he’s been with for less than a month and I’m over here getting ghosted and can’t even get a date ??♀️?
— Blonde Belle (@blondeALbelle) February 24, 2018
Those long paragraphs that were once hyping you the fuck up resort to one-syllable phrases like 'cool,' 'sup' or 'dope.'
You've routinely become the first one to reach out
I already hate being the first one to send the ‘wyd’ text because I don’t want to paint myself as a thirsty thot. I have that saved for my Snapchat fans.
I love getting ghosted by people I’m not even dating
— Katie ??? (@katiekinzakat) February 23, 2018
However, if you’re beginning to feel like a nag or bothersome, then it should come as no surprise that your texts from them have been plummeting and will continue on that decline.
Not a single one of their friends has met you
Meeting their friends used to be a huge leap in your relationship — that’s not the case if you’re about to get ghosted. You’re basically not even situationship status if you haven’t yet met the squad, and you ain’t gonna.
I'm not sure what counts as getting ghosted but I feel like breaking my phone so I stop checking it
— ? riley (@novemberpoems) February 22, 2018
Don’t even waste your breath asking when you’re going to meet them. He or she hasn’t even made mention of your Twitter handle.
They’ve stopped asking for nudes
Red alert hoe! They’re dropping you harder than Nicki Minaj’s ass mishap.
just saw the guy who ghosted the fuck out of me after texting on his watch while making out with me … ahhhhh memories ❤️
— Tommy (@melotommy_) March 1, 2018
You’re deluded if you think your hookup suddenly cares more about your brains than your breasts. Your relationship is practically a remote job position, so they’re always looking forward to the hard work you put in to contort yourself.
Hopefully by now you can predict when your dumper is ready to dump all over you and your heart, and you can be the one to ghost first before their next text even goes through.