Sammi and Ronnie still have relationship drama, and it’s ruining the Jersey Shore reunion
Ronnie should’ve never put his head in between a cocktail waitress’ breasts
by Una Dabiero
Jersey Shore is coming back Thursday! And as someone who based her entire aesthetic in the late 2000s off Snooki and was an avid screamer of "T-Shirt Time!" as a teen, I'm fucking excited for the reunion season. But I got a little sad when I found out Ronnie and Sammi have found a way to fuck up this new season just like they did allllll the seasons prior. You know, except season 1. May the innocent days when no one hated each other rest in peace.
The perpetually-screaming couple definitely went through it — dating on and off for years after Ronnie made out with two girls and put his head in between a cocktail waitress' breasts. But apparently, they still haven't let their astonishingly toxic relationship go.
Sammi revealed over the weekend that she won't be returning to the show to focus on her 'career' and her not-on-reality-TV relationships
Which like, ok, fair! I probably couldn't take months off work to go be on TV.
But of course, everyone recognizes that Ronnie and his wife being there definitely played a huge part in her decision
Like, she obviously doesn't want to get caught up in his shit again and she definitely doesn't want to deal with him being an asshole — which he definitely would be. But being a fucking grown-up, Sammi didn't bring that up. She made it about her.
Ronnie, who refuses to take responsibility for fucking ANYTHING, decided to publicly defend himself against something Sammi never even said
He told US Weekly: “We started this all together and I would have loved to have finished it together because now everyone thinks it’s because of me she didn’t come back, but it’s because she has a boyfriend.”
I'm pissed that Sammi won't be on the show because of how childish Ronnie remains. And I'm pissed that he can't even see how immature this all is! Sure, it's probably best that these two never see each other again, but the show just won't be the same without seeing some kind of conclusion to their relationship. They were a huge part of the show! Their crazy asses definitely got the most air time.
And like, this whole mess really has me feeling things. Is there life after love? I guess not on the Jersey Shore. Someone grab me a margarita from Karma, because I just realized I'm never gonna get closure from my ex if 30-year-olds with babies can't even be civil.