That viral video of the creepy Tinder date is total bullshit, sorry

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That viral video of the creepy Tinder date is total bullshit, sorry

‘Heard this story from about six different people claiming it happened to their cousin’s sister’s friend’s girlfriend’

By now everyone from your grandma to your flat-earther friend has sent you that video of a woman describing a creepy Tinder date. And it is terrifying – on the video, you can hear someone describing a date that went horribly wrong.

A woman feels sick on a scary Tinder date, the story goes, so asks the guy to leave. He does, and she goes to sleep only to wake up in the middle of the night to hear him inside her home, rearranging furniture downstairs. She locks her bedroom door and calls the cops, who arrest him. When she goes down, she sees to her horror that her Tinder date has covered her kitchen in plastic sheets and laid out a hammer and a chainsaw. Holy shit!!

Everyone is freaking out about this – over three million people have watched the video. "This has to be the scariest thing ever," said the person who first posted it. "I feel physically sick listening to it."

Except this has to be bullshit. There's no way it's real. The story is garbled, full of unlikely details and has the most insane punchline. It's also a retooled version of an urban myth that has circulated for years – a woman wakes up in the middle of the night to find her date preparing a fiendish murder room in her own house – it's a cross between Dexter and the Citizen Kane of horror prequels, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning.

It's also ripped off from a viral Twitter thread from last week that is word for word the same story, and definitely, actually happened to a "friend of a friend," or in the words of someone on Twitter: "Have heard this story from about six different people in the last year claiming it happened to their cousin's sister's friend's girlfriend blah blah."

Go through the text of the viral video describing this Dexter Tinder date and see for yourself:

Eventually, he was like, ‘Oh do you want to meet up, we should like go on a date.' She was like, 'Yeah OK'. So he picked her up and they drove to a restaurant and she started to feel really sick. She was like, 'Oh do you mind if I go home, I'm not feeling very well.' He was like, 'Yeah that’s fine I’ll give you a lift home.'

In the car she started to feel a bit better so she was like 'Oh do you want to come into my house for a coffee.' He was like, 'Yeah OK that sounds good.' And then when he got inside she started to feel really sick again. She said 'Oh do you mind if you leave I don’t feel very well.' He was like, 'Yeah no totally fine I’ll go.'

He left and she went to bed. She woke up in the middle of the night and she could hear like something downstairs but she didn’t think anything of it. And she heard it again and it heard like someone was moving her kitchen table. So she ran and shut her door and rang the police and was like, 'There’s someone in my house you need to come.'

So the police are like, 'OK stay on the phone like we’re going to come to your house.' They got to her door and they were like, 'Your door’s locked we don’t think anyone will to be in there.' She said, 'No someone’s here I give you permission to knock down my door.' So they knocked down her door and she heard like some scuffling, like someone being pinned down.

The policeman came up to her room and knocked on the door and said like, 'It’s the police, you’re fine, it’s safe like we’ve got the man you can open the door.' They were like, 'It’s fine he’s not here anymore but we still don’t think you should stay the night here.' And she was like, 'OK that’s fine but can I see what he’s done downstairs?' They were like, 'We really don’t think you should see what he’s done, we don’t think you should see what’s happened.'

She was like, 'No I need to see what he’s done with my house.' She went downstairs and he'd put up plastic on all of her furniture, like clear plastic sheets to cover it all up. And there was a saw and a hammer lined up on her floor. And then basically they found out he had like drugged her and the amount of drugs that was in her system, like, she shouldn’t have woken up.

And also like when he came into her house the reason he got in was because he put his car keys down next to her keys and then when he left he picked up both of them and then he let himself back in. Like literally I am never ever going on a Tinder date ever again it actually killed me.

Yeah right! It's just like the Tinder laxative story – pure bullshit.

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