Need more proof that men ain’t shit? Read up on how these girls were mercilessly dumped
‘I had pizza and wine in hand when he said he didn’t love me anymore’
by Ari Bines
Men have already come up with creative ways to ask for nudes and send dick pics. Apparently, though, they've been researching shitty ways to dump their significant others, too.
If you had an ounce of hope for any kind of serious summer relationship, I'm here to bring your head out of the clouds and back down to earth. We asked girls to tell us their worst breakup stories, and now I feel like I need some chocolate and a hug.
I wasn't necessarily dumped by him directly, but it feels the same: I found out my boyfriend of a year had been soliciting himself for sex on Craigslist…to other men.
I felt like my ex wasn’t being as romantic as he used to be and ignored me every time I tried to rekindle the spark. So I confronted him about it via text. He texted me back saying we were better off as friends. He texted me this while I was at work (which he knew because he asked me how it was going earlier). He did it three days before my birthday, causing me to start crying at the register. Later, he told me that he wasn’t happy in the relationship and found being in a relationship "annoying" in general.
My ex ghosted me two days before my birthday and got married a week later—I found out on the Instagram explore page.
After two years of engagement, my fiancé surprised me when I came home from work (he was unemployed at the time). I was carrying in pizza and wine for dinner, and he abruptly tells me he doesn't love me anymore. Like, right as I walk in while he's playing XBox with three other friends. When I asked him what her name was (my immediate reaction) he shrugged and said, "Kristen".
It wasn't anything too crazy, but my ex broke up with me because I got my weed from a different guy instead of him and lied about it. But in all honesty, I was sick of the strain he had and he broke up with me on the phone and put all my stuff in my parents yard.
I got dumped via Snapchat roughly two hours after he left my apartment. Two weeks later, he messaged me on Snapchat again to tell me he had Chlamydia (only he didn’t), so that I’d go to the university clinic and be given medication that would give me nonstop diarrhea for three hours. I found out a few months later that the whole chlamydia thing was a prank.
My boyfriend from high school and I were on-and-off all four years. The last day we ever spoke, he pushed me off the stage in the theater and then again in the seat aisles. It seemed like a breakup attempt to me…?
My first boyfriend dumped me, but then asked if I wanted to go play laser tag with our friends. Little did I know they were actually already on their way to pick him up. The new girl he wanted was with them. They all drove by and didn’t acknowledge me because he told them it would "make things awkward." I was 16.
My first boyfriend told me he would love me forever. Two days later, he broke up with me over the phone, claiming he’d fallen out of love with me months before. Three weeks later, I found out he was dating some hoe, obviously while he and I were still together.
I was living with this one guy. After two years of living together, I found out he was cheating on me. When I called him to try and talk, he ghosted me and left all his stuff at my house. Guess it's mine now!
My boyfriend at the time was on the other side of the country visiting family (one of my closest friends is his cousin), and he decided to Skype me. We were probably on the call for about two hours and everything was perfectly fine until out of the blue he goes all quiet and starts mumbling. I asked him to repeat what he said, and very rushed and under his breath he said that he liked someone else and then hung up the call.
I called back and he answered and started talking as if nothing had happened. I asked about what he said and he pretended not to know what I was talking about, so I kept persisting and finally he goes, "Yes, I like someone else, but at least I told you and didn't decide to cheat on you instead." I was absolutely devastated and asked what it meant for our relationship and he said: "I guess it means we're broken up then, doesn't it?" and then hung up the call again. I haven't spoken to him since.
My ex boyfriend of almost two years broke up with me the day after Valentine’s Day, after refusing to celebrate it with me. It was over text while I was at work. Then he proceeded to hook up with one of my best friends, who could be mistaken for my twin.
My ex broke up with me in 1992…on the office answering machine. The entire office was standing there and heard everything. It was so embarrassing.
I'd been dating this dude for like a month. I was at school and we were learning about various animal reproduction and how kangaroos are born and developed. So I text him and told him, thinking he'd find it interesting. His response was "Yeah, so the kangaroos pouch is a womb!" I corrected him telling him that it most definitely isn't a womb, as the kangaroos womb is an actual womb but he wouldn't have it.
He freaked out and started texting me all sorts of vile things, name-calling and sending me articles on kangaroos. I turned my phone off after a bit of arguing and when I switched it back on, he'd messaged me saying he couldn't be with someone who refused to admit they were wrong and blocked me on everything! Then, a week later, he tried pestering me for sex. Oh and by the way, I'm right about the fucking kangaroos.
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