The Curvy Wife Guy is back on his bullshit and desperate to go viral again

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The Curvy Wife Guy is back on his bullshit and desperate to go viral again

‘This gorgeous girl I married fills out every inch of her jeans’

It is with greatest regret that I must inform you the I Love My Curvy Wife guy is back on his bullshit. It has been almost a year since he first ejaculated onto your timeline with his strange declaration that he liked his spouse. "There is nothing sexier than this woman right here: thick thighs, big booty, cute little side roll," said The Thick Wife Guy, né Robbie Tripp. "Her shape and size won't be the one featured on the cover of Cosmopolitan but it's the one featured in my life and in my heart."

It was an outrageously viral post that was praised by sincere losers and ripped into by us. There was something deeply unsettling about the way he saw himself as a martyr for thiccness. But it made him famous and rich and he's now desperately trying to go viral again for the same thing. Check out a recent post:

|| People stare at Sarah wherever we go. I notice it constantly. Women look her outfits up and down, and men check her out. She brushes it off because she doesn’t like to be the focus of attention. For me however, it makes me proud. Proud that I get to call this gorgeous woman my wife. Proud that I’m the one that gets to take her home every night. Proud that I’m the guy she chose to take my last name. Sometimes when we’re out and she’s just killing the game in one of her fire outfits, I have to resist the urge to yell: “THIS IS MRS. TRIPP AND SHE’S ALL MINE!” I can’t celebrate this stunner enough. She makes me so happy just by being next to me that all I want to do is make her happy for the rest of forever. I made a promise to her long ago that I would always do anything and everything to make her happy. So whether it be another designer handbag or just drawing your bath after a long day of photo shoots, I’ve got you dollface. You don’t ever have to worry about anything as long as I’m by your side. || #MyQueen #TeamTripp

A post shared by ROBBIE TRIPP™ (@tripp) on

"People stare at Sarah wherever we go. I notice it constantly. Women look her outfits up and down, and men check her out. She brushes it off because she doesn’t like to be the focus of attention… I have to resist the urge to yell: 'THIS IS MRS. TRIPP AND SHE’S ALL MINE!'"

It's so weird – and possessive. "She doesn't like to be the focus of attention," and yet here she is on your very popular Instagram with a photo of you with your thumbs up next to her ass.

Here he is again, just last night:

|| We live in a society that has always told women their bodies are not good enough. That they need to be flawless in order to fit the description of “sexy” or “beautiful.” For decades we’ve been sold a lie, a sickly formula of what a woman has to have in order to make her desirable: small waist but with a big booty, big boobs but still skinny, pouty lips but not too inflated, flat stomach but not too muscular, toned arms but not too ripped, long legs but not too tall. Magazines, billboards, commercials have evangelized this same specific formula for years, one after the other, until we all believed it. Until curvy women all over the world believed that they would always be looked past and passed over because men only want a petite blonde with a size 2 waist. Celebrities perpetuated the mold and society bought into this hollow appearance of perfection, and in doing so we lost sight of the wonderful imperfections that make us all unique: scars, freckles, moles, dimples, curves, rolls, wrinkles. The beauty of a real woman is found in her smile, her heart, her strength, her power. It is through women that we all entered this world. Therefore, women are divine. And they are so much more than a carefully contrived caricature of what we’ve been told they should look like. Imperfection is perfection. Authenticity is beauty. Love the women in your life. Celebrate their genuine beauty. We’d all be lost without them. || #myqueen #realtalk #bodypositive #curvywife #bodypositivity #sanfranciscoblogger

A post shared by ROBBIE TRIPP™ (@tripp) on

"We lost sight of the wonderful imperfections that make us all unique: scars, freckles, moles, dimples, curves, rolls, wrinkles. The beauty of a real woman is found in her smile, her heart, her strength, her power. It is through women that we all entered this world. Therefore, women are divine… #myqueen."

He keeps doing it:

"Wife up a curvy girl and you will get a pin-up model, a fantastic cook, a sensual goddess, and the world’s comfiest pillow all wrapped into one." Jesus Christ. He must know what made him successful the first time around, and keeps trying to recreate it.

Go through Robbie Tripp's immensely popular Instagram and you'll see just how often he posts about his curvy but shy wife. You'll notice post after post about her – he nicknamed her "dollface." And you'll also see a lot of sponsored content. He is getting deals out the ass. A quick search through posts (just posts, not Insta stories) since January 1st show him tagging brands, thanking them for free stuff or shouting them out for being "awesome." The incomplete list includes Alaska Airlines (three times), Chase Bank, the Ritz-Carlton Rancho Mirage, the Miramonte Indian Wells Resort and Spa, Boulders Resort and Spa (all five star hotels), Shopstyle, Rakuten (partner of the Golden State Warriors), BottleRock festival, European Wax Center, Safari West wildlife preserve and Boda Skins leather jackets. He claims to earn a six figure salary from all this.

And on some level, well done to him. He is just a guy who, since he set up his Instagram account, posted about how good and cool his life was, often using the hashtag #TrippSwag. And now through sheer force of posting, Tripp has a five star, first class lifestyle where he gets to go on vacation for money. The man is a genius. But also something of a charlatan.

Tripp has finagled brands into paying him by pretending to be a thinkfluencing millennial powerhouse. He says he is a successful speaker and author, but I've seen his Tedx speech and read his book, and they are both unspeakably awful.

His Tedx talk (not to be confused with a Ted talk, this one was in a community center in front of a small and unlaughing crowd) was a vacuous rant about how millennials are actually good. He said he was living his best life as a creative, and made the sensational claim: "I'm living my dream, man. I'm a published author and writer living in San Francisco."

Like hell he is! If you were being kind, you'd say he is a self-published pamphleteer and blogger. If you were being accurate, you'd say he once uploaded a PDF of an insane screed to Amazon and posts pictures on Instagram. And I should know, because I've read his book, Creative Rebellion, and paid all of $9.50 for it (worth every penny if you are a sucker for bullshit). Robbie Tripp calls it a "creative bible for the disruptive soul," but I would rather call it "disturbing screams in the night." Here's an extract:

Image may contain: Poster, Paper, Flyer, Brochure, Text, LetterImage may contain: Text, Letter

Image may contain: Text, Letter

Your guess is as good as mine

Amazingly, this nonsense worked on the brands because they now pay him to have fun. They saw a guy saying his wife was thick, his book was revolutionary and his speech was game-changing, and not pausing to check that the last two both sucked ass, started writing checks.

So is it a stretch to say Tripp uses his wife just like his bogus book and garbage speech to get sponsored ad deals? That the way he plasters her all over his Instagram feed and calls her "the world’s comfiest pillow" to rake in the likes and bag his next brand partnership is purely calculated, just like the way he said his book was an inspirational "avant-garde stream of consciousness"? Maybe one of his recent posts speaks for itself: "You are solid gold, dollface."

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@hshukman