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Should I text him?: A guide to when you should double text… or text at all
A question as old as time
by Una Dabiero
There’s probably only one question girls ask more than “does my hair look alright?!” And of course, it has to do with a guy. I can barely go five minutes without hearing some girl around me go: “Should I text him?” Tale as old as time — or at least as old as cell phones.
I’m guessing you’re asking the same question since you clicked this link. You probably went on a date with a guy who hasn’t texted you yet, or he just texted you five minutes ago, or the HE is actually your ex and he’s texting you WAY too much. No matter why you’re wondering “Should I text him?”, I have an answer for you. Here’s how to answer the MOST IMPORTANT of questions on a case-by-case basis.
He just asked me for a nude… should I text him back?
HOW did he ask you for a nude? Do you guys barely know each other and he just asked for a tittie pic? Or have you been seeing each other for a while and he's just really in the mood? It's up to you to decide whether or not you want to send this guy pictures of your body. I'm not going to shame you either way. We all know you're hot and if you want to share that with him, cool! Just be careful out there. You never know who's gonna do some illegal shit with your pics.
He asked me on a date in person but hasn’t hit my phone… should I text him?
I would give this one time. If he asked you out in person, which is way harder over text, he probably means it. He's either nervous about making his proposition official, or something's come up. Give it a few days. And if it's been a few days… he sounds like a jerk who won't follow through anyways. Only respond to him if he has a GOOD reason for taking so long.
We went on a date but he hasn’t texted me yet… should I text him?
How long has it been? If it's been less than 18 hours, don't text him. It's around the one day mark where you can tell him how great your date was and how you'd LOVE to do it again. That's just social code.
He hasn’t texted me back in a LONG time… should I text him?
How long is a long time? If it's been more than 24 hours… yeah, you should probably check on that. If you guys just started talking, send a follow-up text making a new conversation. If you're dating or if you've been talking for a long time, feel free to be a little more forward. Maybe a "what's up?" or a "?"
If it's been less than 24 hours, you can probably chill. It's annoying, but guys are playing the game too. He can't seem too interested. If he doesn't respond to your follow up, he's not into you. I'm sorry, it sucks. But the sooner you realize it, the sooner you can move on.
He’s my ex and I miss him… should I text him?
Do you want to get back with him? SHOULD you get back with him? I think those are the two questions you have to ask before you text an ex. Texting your ex for no reason but to talk never works out for anyone, and I just highly discourage it. But if you're missing him and wanting to get back together, you need to decide if that's a healthy, viable option first. Also… is he going to want to get back together? We need to answer that too, so you don't get your heartbroken.
I ghosted him a while back but now I want to hit him up… should I text him?
Mmmm…. probably not. Unless you guys were strictly a hook-up and you know you won't be hurting him by reaching out, I would keep my hands to myself. If this guy really liked you and you're reaching out because you're lonely, that's really not cool. I won't help anyone be a bitch around here.
He sent me his number on Tinder… should I text him?
Was he hot? If you saw something there — whether he was attractive or y'all had a great talk — you should text him. He's probably waiting on you to make the first move. But once you send that initial "hey," give it some time. Don't double text! We all know that's the #1 rule of the game.
We hooked up but he hasn’t texted me yet… should I text him?
Girl… how long has it been? Has it been at least a few days? Are you texting him because you want to talk or because you're in the mood to hook up again? If it's been less than 48 hours… don't text him. Chances are, he just sees you as a hook-up and it's best if you view him that way, too. Try to only hit him up when you want to hook-up, and make sure you aren't using that excuse to text him back 12 hours after y'all fucked. And if he ghosts you? Don't hit him up ever again. Dick is abundant and low in value.
We met IRL and he gave me his number… should I text him?
It depends — was he cute? Could you see something happening with him? If your gut instinct is like, yeah, I like this guy, then you should definitely text him. But it's best to wait at LEAST 12 hours before you send him that "hey!" You have to play the game. If you met him and you weren't super into him at the bar, I would just not bother texting him. It'll save you some time and him some heartbreak. It's a win-win.
He’s my ex and he texted me… should I text him back?
Are you guys friends? It doesn't seem like it if you came all the way here to see if you should hit him back. If your ex texted you and you guys haven't maintained a relationship, it's probably best to go ghost. He's probably lonely or feeling bad about something he did, and it's not worth your time or emotional labor to go through this conversation with him. The only exception? If you've been missing him and really think there's a way for you two to get back together. Should you EVER get back with an ex? I don't know. Here's some girls' advice on all that.
I’m not sure texting him is ever worth it, to be completely honest with you. Unless he’s fucking Prince Eric with the body of Channing Tatum and the brain of Stephen Hawking, he’s probably not worth your time. But I get it, we all need someone to talk to in between our rotation from Instagram to Twitter to Tinder. It’s a lonely, lonely world out there. I hope you find a guy to share meme accounts with. Xoxo.
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