People think they can hypnotize themselves into looking like Kendall and Ariana

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People think they can hypnotize themselves into looking like Kendall and Ariana

It totally works like this

The largest brain behavior, as we have just found out, comes from people who think they can reshape their faces with subliminal messaging videos. I am not kidding – there is a large online community of complete dingbats who honestly believe that by watching "subliminal face" clips they can make themselves look like Kendall Jenner and Ariana Grande.

Go on YouTube and search for "subliminal face" and you'll find countless links with hundreds of thousands of views saying the path to a sexy face is watching a video like this every day for three months:

That video says it will give you a "beautiful feminine alluring face," and a "cute and sexy model face" and also make you "be extremely videogenic and photogenic." Like hell it will, obviously, because it's just a Windows Moviemaker montage of models set to lo-fi hip-hop 24h – beats to relax/study to.

But that hasn't stopped loads of headcases commenting things like "I listened to this about 11 times in one day and my face structure is different" and "After half a week, my eyes are almost honey color (I had dark brown) my jawline is WAY more prominent and my nose is becoming smaller :))"

My favorite: "day 4 [I was listening to this at least 5 times a day and I was drinking a lots of water] : My eyes are lighter and brighter, my jawline is more sharp, I don’t have that much of a double chin anymore and my lips are nicer and plumper, I feel prettier."

The pinnacle of this art form is a video that allows you to Look Like Ariana Grande in 3 Days Subliminal. It is through-the-looking-glass weird – a grainy montage of Ariana pictures set to Into You, with a quiet and creepy voice saying: "I am already seeing a result, I get results fast, I can see my shape as Ariana, my eyebrows are thick and straight, I have thick and straight eyebrows, my eyebrows have grown, I have big beautiful eyebrows."

Commenters seem to agree that this video is magic. "My eyes became bigger, they look better now and also they became much more almond shaped. Overall they became almost like Ari's," said one.

Pick another facial insecurity you might have, and you'll be able to find a video for it:

There's also one for the guys!

There are a load of Facebook groups promising subliminal "RESULTS" but they haven't accepted me yet. What appears to be a post from one of those groups appeared on a Reddit forum for "insane people on Facebook." It shows a guy who claimed to shorten his philtrium (the space between your lip and your nose) in just 120 days by watching subliminal videos. "I can clearly notice the changes at the upper lip area," but I will be honest and say it looks like he Facetuned the same photo and uploaded two versions:

Image may contain: Text, Poster, Paper, Flyer, Brochure

Bonus gag

Hey, is there a subliminal messaging video for dick size? Asking for your boyfriend!! Haha, just kidding.

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@hshukman