Beto lost last night, so really, we all lost
This is heartbreaking
I hate the "cover this, not that" game annoying blue check losers love to play on Twitter as much as the next person, but honestly, the only thing I want to see on my TL today is thirsty Beto O’Rourke coverage. Y'all really let him lose, huh?
I know that's not the only thing that happened last night — Democrats reclaimed the House, a record number of women were elected, a man who writes Bigfoot erotica became a congressman — but if Beto had won, this man was going to stop cheating on his girl!!
Good luck sleeping with that on your conscience.
If Beto wins I’ll stop cheating on my girl
— ELVYS (@Elvysbitch) November 7, 2018
You know what else will be weighing heavily on you in coming weeks?
This girl will never love her virginity
if beto wins i’m losing my virginity
— jEn (@luljen) November 6, 2018
This dude will never dance a jig
If Beto wins I swear to Christ I’ll dance a jig
— BenDavid Grabinski (@bdgrabinski) November 7, 2018
This chick will never get her shit together
If Beto wins I’ll get my shit together
— etlendy (@_eyyyyidc_) November 7, 2018
Emily will never get Beto's mugshot tattooed on her ass
If Beto wins I'm gonna get his mugshot tattooed on my ass
— Emily Baldo (@wacccck) November 6, 2018
An absolute travesty if you ask me. He looked hot in this, don't @ me.
Texas Republican Party really thought they did something there. SMH.
We'll never get nudes from this girl
If Beto wins i'm sending my nudes to everybody who rts this
— isamar 🌙 (@izzymunoz95) November 7, 2018
Efren will not suck one hundred cocks before the year's end
if beto wins i’ll suck 100 cocks before the year ends
— efren (@deIphinium) November 7, 2018
Actually, blowjobs are canceled altogether
if beto wins everybody gets a blowjob
— tiny tim (@graemcracker) November 7, 2018
No more booty pics
booty pics for everyone if beto wins
— clarissa (@cjmdtx) November 6, 2018
No more pizza
if Beto wins I’ll buy whoever rt this a pizza
— krist (@chrspkc) November 6, 2018
This person's crush will never know they exist
If Beto wins I’ll ask my crush out pic.twitter.com/w2QgyMAbZc
— isaac.up (@Isaac1up) November 7, 2018
This girl is going to execute herself
if beto doesn’t win i’m executing myself pic.twitter.com/6u5ClP788M
— elisabeth Ⓥ (@eklein856) November 7, 2018
And we never even got to see Rosey's boob on Twitter
If Beto wins I’ll put one of my boobs on twitter.
— Rosey Blair (@roseybeeme) November 7, 2018
If nothing else, Ninah still know the bliss of chugging Four Loko
If Beto wins I will literally chug a 4 loko, but if he loses I will also chug a 4 loko
— ninah (@ninah_bee) November 6, 2018
Limited rights for women and minorities. We're giving every single person a gun. Fuck DACA students! And we can just toss healthcare and and the LGBTQ+ community right in the bin.
It's cool though, because at least this guy is not gonna fight every old white person he sees.
If Ted Cruz wins I’m fighting every 40+ year old white person I see
— jessy (@JessyVoss) November 7, 2018
But if Beto can get 49 percent in Texas, imagine what he could get in the whole ass USA. Republicans underestimate him at their own peril.
Beto 2020. Free my man!