pop • Nov 12 2018

This thread of dumb shit people have said to celebrities is proof none of us deserve anything good in life

‘I told Halsey I was worried about her’

Have I imagined what I would say to certain celebrities if I could meet them? Yes, obviously! If I met Taylor Swift, I'd probably cry about how much I love her work. If I met Nick Jonas (in 2009, not now) I'd pretend to be super aloof like I didn't care because anyone who's read a fan fic knows feigning indifference to a celebrity is how you get them to fall in love with you. And if I met John Mayer, there'd be no talking — only fists and probably a first-degree assault charge because don't you think 19's too young to be played by your dark, twisted games when she loved you so???? You should have known!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But that all pales in comparison to Rach Marshall's now-iconic tweet prompting people to share the dumbest thing they've said to a celebrity. Some of it is pretty innocuous-dumb, like the fan who cried to Harry Styles or the girl who asked Born This Way Era Gaga for a ciggie. Some of it is…you know, the right amount of weird:

I have a bladder infection but I thought Fireproof was a shit lead single

Do you honestly think That Bitch Rihanna has folded clothes since like 2007

I was pulled over for going 50 miles over the speed limit. When I showed the cop I was listening to Trixie Mattel's smash-hit record, the office wrote HIMSELF a ticket!! Amazing!!!

Some of it are FACTS that need to be stated, like this girl who told Halsey she was worried about her. I'M worried about Halsey and I'm not even a stan!

Then there was this saga, in which Skrillex gets visibly worried about a potential Home Alone-style situation. Fun Fact: In college, I got crossfaded so hard that I got whiplash at a Skrillex concert I accidentally attended. Seriously, I was in a neckbrace and everything!

This one is actually really pure because a woman worth half a billion dollars really pretended to be into some fucking Forever 21 sale rack shit just to be polite. Ugh, her MIND!!!!!!!!!!!!

And finally, we have this one. You know, I have to laugh!

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