How to make someone notice you…even if they don’t know your name

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How to make someone notice you…even if they don’t know your name

Do NOT, I repeat, do NOT be creepy

So the wedding is set for May 2020, your bridesmaids are going to be wearing blue to match his eyes, and the honeymoon is going to be, of course, in Paris. Only issue? He…literally doesn’t even know your name.

In 2018 it’s really easy to develop a crush on someone before getting to know them. We half-meet someone once, follow them on Insta, and suddenly we’re texting our best friend we’ve met our future husband. But don’t you think he should maybe know you exist first? Here’s how to make someone notice you when you’re pretty sure they haven’t:

Make sure they are available

If you aren’t already one hundred percent sure they are single, you’re going to want to look into it. There’s nothing worse than spending a ton of time thinking about and flirting with someone, only to find out they’re one half of a happy, committed relationship. If you aren’t following them on IG, get a friend to follow them, and see if they’ve posted photos with the same person lately. This will save you a lot of time in the end.

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Change something up

You’re sure they’re single and you’re wondering what’s next. I’m not telling you to change yourself for someone, but I am telling you they obviously haven’t noticed you up to this point, so it would be kind of pointless to keep doing the same thing, yes? This doesn’t have to be drastic, and it shouldn’t be. If you’ve never worn a dress a day in your life, you do not need to start showing up to things in bodycons, and if you like your brunette hair the way it is, you don’t need to spend two hundred (of your mom’s) dollars on a full dye-job. Some subtle changes include: trying a new style of eyeliner, tossing in highlights or lowlights, opting for a slide when you would usually opt for a sneaker, or tossing up a high pony. He might not notice — guys rarely notice these things — but he also might. Either way, a little change offers a confidence boost, and you’re going to need confidence walking into this.

Become friends with one of their friends

IMO this is your best possible route because it seems the least calculated. You just happened to become friends with their friend, who just happened to invite you to something, and you’re in. Of course, in this case, you’ll still have to start talking with someone you’ve never spoken to before, but it’s a lot easier to talk to someone when you don’t have a massive crush on them. Plus, you might end up liking this person more than the person you thought you liked. And, if it works between you and the person you’re into, you’re already in with their friends, so it’s a win-win.

Show up somewhere you know they’ll be

I’m not suggesting you stalk them on find my friends per say, but between Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook and Twitter, it’s pretty easy to figure out where anyone is going to be an any point in time. If you know they’re going to be at a certain bar tonight, show up with friends, or if you know they’re going to be at a friend of a friend’s birthday party, it shouldn’t be hard to finagle an invite and *casually* bump into them once you’ve had enough wine to ensure confidence.

Flirt with someone they’re close with

This sounds…counterintuitive, but one thing that peak’s anyone’s attention is jealousy. I wouldn’t go as far as fucking their friend (although you can), because this might make it awkward when you suddenly want to swap, but a little light flirting never hurt anyone. In fact, it’s probably only helped. This includes everything from sliding into their DMs with a question, liking/commenting on their photos, etc. Anything that’ll get them to say your name to the person you’re interested. Now you’re on their mind.

Plant the seed

So you’ve done everything above, you’re on their mind, and they still haven’t asked you out. What the fuck? Well that’s because they still don’t KNOW you. This is important to remember. No matter how much time you’ve invested in stalking them, you have to remember you are still a complete stranger to them. Suddenly hitting them with a “WYD tonight?” text is completely out of the question. However, this would be a good time to plant the seed. Smash that MF follow, strike up a convo with them for the first time, or shoot them a super casual DM (like a soft reply to their story). This way it will come off as sweet, not weird.

Back away

Now that you’ve planted the seed, you absolutely have to back away. You’ve baited and all you can do is wait, because messaging again would be, like I said, creepy as fuck. You do NOT want this complete stranger to know you are already obsessed with them. Hide the wedding pinterest, clear the history in your browser, and chill out. Once you’ve made contact, consider the ball in their court. Guys can be thick, but they know when someone has made a move. If they are interested (literally at all) they will make the next move.

Plus, this way you can be sure they like you (almost) as much as you like them.

@carolinephinney