My boyfriend and I have an open relationship and you should want one, too
I’ve been dating my beau for 3 years and he just came around to the idea
by Krisha Patel
Why would anyone want to have an open relationship? Maybe you’re tired of being only with one significant other, or maybe you just want a little diversity in your life. Whatever the reason, I think the main reason anyone – myself included – would want to have an open relationship is because they want some freedom.
I’m 20 years old and I’ve been in a relationship with my high school boyfriend for three years. I’m in college, so can someone really blame me for wanting to open my wings and fly? Let’s discuss all the pros of having an open relationship.
It allows you and your partner to be more adventurous
When I talked to my boyfriend about having an open relationship, he laughed in my face. But after some consideration, a massage and a beer, he came around to the idea. When you’re in a relationship for a long time, you start to get comfortable around each other. All the things that made your stomach feel like it had butterflies in the beginning of a relationship start to simmer down. You stop trying to look your best, and the things your partner did that you once found cute become the most annoying traits anyone could have. An open relationship allows you and your partner to rediscover the “honeymoon” phases of your relationship, only this time, it’s with someone else.
You can bring out your inner hoe without consequences
I know I’m not the only person who has ever thought of being with another girl/guy while also being in a relationship, especially if it’s a long distance relationship. It’s natural to get lonely and want a little action on the side. Engaging in an open relationship gives you the freedom to drunkenly make out with someone else without your partner accusing you of cheating and breaking up with you. I mean he/she is probably doing the same thing, so think of it as a win-win situation.
You’re young, so why not?
I’m 20 years old and I have years ahead of me before I have to settle down with a man. Do I really want to have only been with one person during my prime years? No, absolutely not. It’s not that I don’t love my boyfriend, because I definitely do, but I think it’s important to exercise your freedom as much as you can during your college years. Being in an open relationship allows you and your partner to sexually experience outside of just the two of you.
Although having an open relationship seems like a great idea, especially if you’re young, there are also some cons.
Jealousy is ugly
Your partner will more than likely get jealous, especially in the beginning stages of having an open relationship. Can you blame them? My boyfriend told me he didn’t like the idea of having to “share” me. Of course, I retaliated by saying the exact same thing. It’s not like I was doing anything completely different with whoever else I was talking to, but it was quite an adjustment and I could see exactly where he was coming from. I was always wondering if my boyfriend thought other girls looked better than me, or if he was emotionally connecting with someone else. Regardless, jealousy was definitely something that came between us at first.
Convincing your partner is not as easy as it sounds
When I was first talking to my boyfriend about having an open relationship, it actually led to more problems than anything else. One of the main issues was why I wanted to engage in such a polygamous act. Was I not happy in my current relationship? What more could I want?
I didn’t want him to assume that I wanted to have random sex with other guys. It was hard convincing him on the idea – until I suggested he goes first. I let him start talking to other girls, going on dates then before you know it, he was on board. The main problem we encountered was whether or not we trusted each other, and the impact it would have on our relationship.
An open relationship is something adventurous to consider for you and your partner. It allows the two of you to explore beyond the scopes of each other, and ultimately brings the two of you closer together than ever.