Farewell to the bra. We don’t need you anymore
As even Kim Kardashian embraces freeing the nipple, it’s time to say goodbye and good riddance
Yeah, we get it, there’s a lot of information out there on freeing the nipple. Every day there’s a new study about whether it’s good for you or not good for you or someone’s done a protest or released a documentary. After a while it starts to feel like a frustratingly slow preamble to the eventual ideal situation for everyone: we just fucking stop wearing bras and it’s no big deal and everyone is richer and freer.
I’m not saying that Kim Kardashian embracing the braless life is the final step we all need to getting rid of bras forever. But she’s got rid of her tit-tape prisons and everyone has lost their minds over it. The Sun have even dragged the fashion statement into the gutter in a ‘day without a bra’ feature which includes puns on melons and dad jokes about people not managing to look her in the eye. The paper also charted how many days it’s been since Kim freed the nipple (nine, if you’re interested).
Posting about it on her Instagram Kim said she “didn’t gaf” about her new “nipple vibes”. In a way she’s right. It shouldn’t be newsworthy that she’s ditched bras, and certainly people shouldn’t be taking the piss out of her for it, but for an audience of millions who have trapped their boobs for years it was the ultimate green light, a shining beacon of bra-less life regardless of your size. She immediately looks cooler, freer, more fashionable, probably less warm all the time.
OK, so 2016 hasn’t been a great year so far. We’ve lost Prince, Bowie, Great British Bake Off, Brad and Angelina, Fabric. There should be at least one good farewell to come out of the year. And let’s be honest, it’s the bra. Farewell, we hardly knew ye.
Brassiere (Bra). Died 21st September 2016, aged 127. Remembered and survived by millions of women who have spent upwards of £20 buying them. RIP.
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