All the people who should get statues instead of those confederate shitbags
Beyoncé always and forever
by Jenn Ficarra
There are way too many erected statues of old, white, racist men that simply should not exist.
Glorifying racism isn't just wrong, it's disgusting, and there are plenty of other people who deserve statues in place of these literal losers.
A man in Virginia, Nathan Coflin, has started a petition to erect a statue of Missy Elliot in Portsmouth and he seems to have the right idea.
— NɅTHɅN💫 (@NathanKnope) August 20, 2017
Why are we continuously putting up statues of men who don't deserve it? Why are we trying to preserve the wrong kind of history? There are plenty of other people out there who have shaped the world and our lives who deserve to be immortalized in bronze. In fact, here are ten people who deserve statues more than the confederate morons (need better insult here).
Meryl Streep as Julia Child
Specifically, this image of her holding the chicken.
Britney Jean Spears
Haters back off, the Princess of Pop just sang live this past weekend reminding us all that she is now and forever perfection. Immortalize her and fast.
Like the finest wine, Uncle Jesse just keeps getting better with age. It'd be hard to capture his beauty in bronze but I believe someone should be up for the task.
The girl who wore McDonald's bags as shoes
Official campaign to find and knight the girl who used McDonald's wrappers for shoes last night pic.twitter.com/aIvLru4fa0
— Martyn (@martynhett) December 17, 2016
She is a true hero to us all.
This was not sponsored in any way, shape, or form by DJ Khaled.
This statue better WORK.
Fiona the Hippo
She's an inspiration to us all.
Chance the Rapper
Not only is he talented AF but he's doing more for Chicago and for the people than any of those confederate shitholes ever did. Chance for President 2020.
Ruth Bader Ginsburg
No explanation necessary. #Notoriousrbg for life.
Honorable Mentions: Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, Janet Jackson, The drunk girl at the bar who told me I looked pretty, Bikini waxers, the cast of One Tree Hill, Mindy Kaling, Sean Combs circa Puff Daddy era, Lauren Conrad, J. Lo but only in this outfit, Ameila Earhart, Lin Manuel Miranda, and, of course, Carrie Fischer.
Remember the thicc wife guy? He’s writing a book
He cannot be stopped
by Harry Shukman
The thicc wife guy, as you will recall, was an extreme dumbass who posted about how he loved his "curvy wife." He was roasted into oblivion last summer for uploading these deeply patronizing and unnerving words to Instagram:"Her shape and size won't be the one featured on the cover of Cosmopolitan but it's the one…
We asked the NSA if there were really government agents watching us from our webcams, and they didn’t deny it
I KNEW IT
by Katie Way
So you're talking to your roommate and you casually mention that you kind of need a haircut. Then you log onto Facebook an hour later, and all you see is haircuts for Aveda salons. What? How the fuck did you just say something out loud, without searching it, and now your computer knows about it?…
Blac Chyna is not to blame for her dick sucking abilities, according to an expert
Let justice roll down
by Caroline Phinney
Two days ago, Revenge porn of Blac Chyna was leaked on Instagram in the form of a sex tape, and everyone on the internet feigned sympathy for three minutes before providing aggressively constructive criticism on her performance.The video was leaked when Star Brim, Cardi B's "best friend," shared a video on Instagram of Chyna giving…