You’re not paranoid: This is how to tell if someone else is closing in on your man

In the dating game, I always strategically assumed that by dating a guy that wasn't on my level and more "cute" and less "SexyBack", he'd never cheat and none of my friends would dare to go after him.

Girl, I was dead wrong.

In fact, one "friend" stole my boyfriend's phone to text another other "friend" pretending to ask her out. And to my disbelief, he broke things off with me to obligatorily go out with her. I promise you, this bullshit is a true-ass story, so if you want to refrain from having the same shitty fate, here are the signs you need to look out for if your girl is trying to bag your man:

They'll constantly ask how your relationship is going

A big thing that I noticed about the girl trying to swoop in on my man was that Karlie (not her real name), always wanted an update on how he and I were "getting along." While I was young and naive, believing she was simply checking in on me to make sure I was happy with him, she secretly was plotting and praying for the day that we split. Some friend, right?

But they'll shy away from listening to you talk about them unprompted

Naturally, no one wants to hear someone talk romantically about the person they're secretly infatuated with. Many times, when I talked about Steven (not his real name), I caught her engaged more with her phone than listening to me spill the deets about the good, the bad, and the hot n' heavy to the whole squad. Now, I'm not saying I was incessantly bragging about my relationship, but if you can't go to your best girlfriends about your boy troubles, then who the fuck can you go to, bruh?

They'll like his selfies on Instagram, hiding behind the 'best friend' card

Karlie started their convo off like he and she were just the boyfriend and the friend, conversing only about my well-being. But once I confronted her about my knowledge of the friend who initiated the conversations between Karlie and my boo, she said "Sorry Ari, but Steven and I are basically together."

I couldn't fathom that she was actually doing this to me because she was legit my best friend. At first, I thought the bitch was delusional and high on some whacked-out drug. But in all seriousness, she played the friend card very well and developed my relationship into her relationship.

I dropped her instantly, and we unfortunately still had to see each other, but I got my happy ending when he dumped her for being a fucking nag (which she was). Karma is the biggest bitch, and you don't want to piss her off. Ever!

@aribines