Women hate monogamy even more than men do, vindicating empowered hoes everywhere


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Women hate monogamy even more than men do, vindicating empowered hoes everywhere

It’s just science

Men are always going on and on about how they are "more sexual" and "wired to roam." According to men, they are testosterone-fueled sex machines who compulsively think about sex every 7 seconds and grope their waitresses because they simply can't help themselves. They are MEN and they are biologically hardwired to fuck five random women at the same time.

Women, on the other hand, are docile and coy creatures who crave the emotional intimacy of monogamy. They don't masturbate, they don't daydream about getting railed by multiple big-dicked strangers, and they can ONLY make love with the one man they truly love.

Fortunately, science is here to tell us that this is all bullshit. According to the latest research and interviews with experts in human sexuality, women are not hard-wired for monogamy. In fact, the very opposite might be true. In her latest book, author Wednesday Martin found that married women in their 20s actually outpace married men when it comes to infidelity. In fact, a whopping 50 percent of women admitted that they had sex with someone else outside their marriage.

Based on their findings, scientists have concluded that women get bored with monogamy and need variety, novelty, and sexual adventure even more than men do — to which I say, no shit? Why else do you think we have so many sex toys? The same dick just isn't gonna cut it after a few months.

And when women do cheat on their partners, it's not because they're seeking some kind of special emotional connection or whatever. It's not even because they're unhappy with their current partner — in fact, most of the women who cheat on their partners describe their marriages as "happy" or "very happy."

The reason is pretty simple. We cheat because we're horny. "I'm here for no-strings-attached sex," multiple women told Martin. Same, girl, same!

In fact, science indicates that WE might be the ones who are biologically wired to be promiscuous. Anthropologists found that the best mothers, across species, are the ones who fuck the most dudes. By sleeping with tons of guys at the same time, women are able to "hedge against male infertility, up her odds of a healthy pregnancy and robust offspring, and create a wider network of support by lining up two or three males who figured the offspring might be theirs."

Sweet, who knew that we were world-class mothers this whole time? Darwin is probably weeping with pride in his grave.