The rules of 2019 have already been decided and there’s nothing we can do about it
People are already mad
I feel kind of bad for 2019 because people are already mad at it and it hasn't even started. It's like when you get with someone following a breakup and you're already assuming they're cheating on and lying to you, because why would anyone ever be genuine?
How can you blame us though? Even if 2018 was a good year for some people ~personally~ this is the first year in a long time almost everyone I've asked has prefaced telling me what they've been grateful for with this, and that speaks volumes. So honestly, we aren't taking any bullshit from 2019. It better just come in, sit the fuck down, and shut up. We're done playing with entire years. So, in the spirit of manifesting a peaceful, submissive 2019 before it begins, the people of Twitter are laying down rules:
Rule #1: Don't tell people your plans, but show them results
Start listening to your Taurus friends
But only fall in love with Capricorns and Virgos
Or Pisces and Cancers — pick your poison
But one thing is for sure and that's NO ARIES
We aren't being ignored
We aren't doubling back on anything
We're falling for a mans results, not his 'potential'
We’re cutting off anyone that gives out mixed signals
We aren't offer the 'girlfriend experience' for free
We're falling in love with ourselves
*Such a Libra thing to say.*
We aren't not holding on to ANY past relationships
And we aren't chasing after shitty 'friends'
We're building each other up instead of competing
We're building a brand while attracting good Karma
But we aren't fucking with anyone who doesn’t fuck with us
OR anyone who doesn't work out immediately
We’re eating vegetables, staying hydrated, using sunscreen and minding our own damn business
We're staying in our own lane
We aren't splurging, we're stacking
And to do this, we are't paying for anything with our own money
And while we're busy doing ALL of this, dudes will be…cupping their nuts in photos?
Weird flex, but okay.
Your weekly horoscopes are here, and it looks like someone is finally going to commit
Took long enough
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When I dip, you dip. The energies of the cosmos seriously slipped last week, and now we’re all rising back up. That means you’re going to have to shake off the dust and become alert. Venus and Saturn will also connect this week, offering us some much-needed connection to other people, as well as clarity…
Your weekly horoscope is all about how to avoid some pretty intense love drama
How to avoid getting dumped after you already bought his Christmas gift
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Mercury’s retrograde ends on December 6th! How are we celebrating? What better way than with a New Moon in Sagittarius the very next day! If you’re wise, you’ll use this for a fresh start to stop getting caught up in the same dramatic situations playing on repeat and move on. Use this as a chance…
An Instagram influencer told us how to travel the world for free (or at least cheap AF)
Fine, I’m the Instagram influencer
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So everyone's always asking me how I'm able to afford all of my many, many glamorous vacations to exotic destinations like Thailand and Greece. The answer, of course, is that I'm chronically broke and I literally wear the same three shirts over and over again. Now there's a solid money-saving hack! But another part of…