This white rapper just released a music video so woke, it ended racism forever


pop  • 

This white rapper just released a music video so woke, it ended racism forever

You can’t be racist if you’ve never owned a slave, duuuh

Tom MacDonald is a white rapper who is desperate for the world to know how hard it is for him to be white and a rapper. So desperate, in fact, that he made a whole song about it.

Because in these times of police brutality, systematic racism and neo-Nazi renaissance, we truly are not taking enough time to consider the plight of the White Man — especially not the White Man who has dollar signs tattooed on his eyelids:

The song is called WHITEBOY and it makes me want to commit seppuku. I hate it, I hate him for making it, and I hate the preachy video he released for it on Friday.

If you don't want to listen, I totally get it — if I wasn't literally getting paid to listen to it, I wouldn't either! It's almost hard to make fun of this guy, because he's made himself look like such a fucking joke already, but lord knows I'll try.

  • WHITEBOY includes choice lines like "no one that I call a friend has ever owned a slave," "being white and being racist aren't the same thing, I promise," and "white people that you hate aren't your neighbors or lawyers, they're the Rockefellers, Rothchilds, Bushes and royals," indicating that MacDonald assumes that…everyone has a lawyer?

    Sonically, it doesn't fare much better. Imagine G-Eazy's flow fucked Macklemore's pseudo-race consciousness and then that baby grew up listening to 3OH!3 and reading r/TheRedPill. Or if Lil Peep was straight and incredibly boring. That's what this song sounds like.

    Unsurprisingly, MacDonald isn't exactly the Wokest Guy when it comes to women, either.

    If I saw Tom MacDonald walking on the street, not only would I cross, I'd probably have to cancel any plans I already had because seeing him would actively ruin my day.

    Unsurprisingly, the music video for WHITEBOY is a toothless, cliché piece of commentary. It's set in a classroom because, according to MacDonald, "it's a learning environment."

    I am learning that this dude sucks ass.

    MacDonald, the White Guy with a Point, begins speaking to the class, who can't handle his controversial ideas like, "Yeah I'm white, but I never put your neck in no noose."

    'Dude, shut the fuck up, this is BC Calc'

    MacDonald then stands up and walks around the room while his fellow students throw shit at him, which was probably kind of fun…for them.

    This guy's entire THING is that it's fun to throw shit at him, right?

    Then he yells on some desks — you know, the classic thing you do when you're mad at school.

    Honestly? I'm scared

    And finally, his teacher (?) cries, probably because he realized that MacDonald is deeply, irreparably stupid and it's really going to fuck up the class's standardized testing average. MacDonald sits back down in his desk, because he's proven his point that it's okay to be white or whatever.

    How much do we think this guy got paid, and why is the answer 'not enough?'

    WHITEBOY is essentially the #NotAllMen of racism — it's lazy to imply that just because someone is your neighbor they can't be racist, and Tom MacDonald is obviously just mad because black people are making fun of his ugly hair and stupid, fake-deep music.

    Related stories recommended by this writer:

    A guide to dealing with your white privileged friends

    This racist sorority girl wrote an entire ESSAY on why she should be allowed to say the n-word

    Cardi B didn't 'copy' Nicky Minaj, she's just a better rapper