The Arctic Monkeys are releasing a new album so break out your flower crowns, because it’s basically 2012 again

Yeah, you read that right: it is 20-fucking-18 and the Arctic Monkeys are dropping a new album on May 11, for the first time in five years. FIVE YEARS. That's basically the whole time I've been alive — or, at least, it's the whole time I've been this version of myself.

I'm shaken, rattled, and can already feel myself regressing to my angsty high school ways. Because now that the Arctic Monkeys, the soundtrack of my pre-20s ennui, are back in the picture that means it's time for a bunch of other shit to make a comeback too.

Are you ready? I sure as shit am not.

Cigarettes with writing on them

Fuck. It's too deep.

'Vibes'

I just sense that the word "vibes" is going to be rearing its ugly head once more. And I'm simply not prepared.

Liking guys who look like they're dressed up for a Halloween party

The best part about Alex Turner? Greaser hair. ADMIT IT.

Getting stick n poke tattoos

Oooh, I want a cross on my middle finger! It's so subversive.

Vampire Weekend is back IN IT now, bitches

Remember when you could get drunk from drinking one beer and you still thought life could turn out to be fun and exciting? That's what Vampire Weekend sounds like. Daddy Ezra, it's always been you.

And fuck it, let's bring Lana back too

The Patron Saint of untreated depression and crying about my boyfriend who cared more about dubstep than hanging out with me.

'Drunk texting'

You know, the kind of "drunk texting" where you say all of your very real feelings in one semi-coherent paragraph in the early hours of the morning? And also you might just be totally sober? But you want an easy out when you've calmed down tomorrow and don't want to confront your demons in the light of day? Haha. Classic.

Fucking somebody who owns a record player (because they own a record player)

The sex? Mediocre. The difference in sound quality? Honestly, not even that noticeable.

Shopping at ModCloth again

I just ordered like, three polka dot skater dresses. Fuck.

Writing sad poetry

Oh, did somebody order a bunch of heavy-handed metaphors about my "bad" relationship with my dad, who is only human and earnestly trying his best to connect with me?

And duh, it's motherfucking Tumblr season

EVERYTHING WAS BEAUTIFUL AND NOTHING HURT 2K18.

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@k80way